Title: Between Love and Honor
Author: 
enchanted_jae
Team: Fanon
Prompt: The Lovers
Wordcount: 2730
Rating: PG13
Warnings: Sexual suggestion
Summary: Draco is faced with the need to choose between the desires of his heart and his obligations to his family.
Author's Note Special thanks to my lovely friend and teammate who beta'ed this. Also, good luck to the rest of Team Fanon!
"The Parkinsons are coming over tonight," Narcissa remarked, taking a sip of tea.
"Oh?" Draco replied, hiding a grimace behind his own cup. He knew his mother had an ulterior motive for inviting the Parkinsons to dinner. It was a commonly held belief that he and Pansy Parkinson would marry someday, and since they'd graduated, Narcissa seemed determined to step up the time table. What she didn't know was that, although Draco was fond of Pansy, he was in love with someone else...someone whom his mother would definitely not approve of.
"Eldora tells me Pansy is eager to spend more time in your company, now that you two have graduated," Narcissa commented, reaching for a small cucumber sandwich.
"I had hoped to spend some time traveling this summer," Draco countered smoothly. He didn't bother to tell his mother that he'd made plans to visit Harry at the small country estate his boyfriend had purchased.
"Indeed?" Narcissa sniffed. "I think perhaps you should concentrate on your family obligations, instead."
Draco had had the concept of family obligations drilled into his head for as long as he could remember. With his father serving a sentence in Azkaban now, Narcissa seemed more intent than ever that Draco fulfill his obligations to the Malfoy name by marrying and producing an heir. Draco felt honor-bound to obey his parents' wishes, yet his heart wasn't in it. His heart was with Harry.
<>*<>*<>*<>
The evening had been a nightmare. Draco had sat on the settee in the parlor, and Pansy had settled herself closer to him than was necessary. She was aware that Draco had been dating Harry while they were still at school, but naively, she had thought it was just a passing phase. Draco wished he could make her understand that there was no future for them...not when he was gay and in love with another man.
Narcissa and Mrs Parkinson had begun discussing wedding plans, as if the engagement were already official, and Mr Parkinson had blathered on to Draco about their family's holdings and what role Draco would be expected to take on once he was part of the family.
It was all Draco could do not to scream.
His face was frozen in an expression of polite interest, but inside, his stomach was churning, and he had a throbbing headache. Only years of strict upbringing prevented Draco from leaping to his feet and telling them all to just shut up.
After an interminable two hours, the Parkinsons finally took their leave. Pansy gave Draco a hug, and he responded with a perfunctory kiss on her cheek. Once they had left, Draco wanted nothing more than to retreat to his room and try to forget what had just transpired. Unfortunately, his mother was still making wedding plans.
"Eldora and I think it's best if we have the first banns read next Sunday," remarked Narcissa. "Don't you agree, Draco?"
No, I don't agree! Draco wanted to shout. Instead, he took a steadying breath and countered with, "Don't you think that's rather sudden?"
"Not at all, dear," Narcissa said with a brittle smile. "You and Pansy are both of age, and in fact, I was the same age when I married your father."
And look how well that turned out, thought Draco, barely able to refrain from snorting. Instead, he held his tongue and excused himself as soon as possible. Draco trudged up the steps and to his bedroom, flinging himself across his bed and wishing he still had a security blanket to curl up with. Unfortunately, his security blanket was somewhere else tonight.
<>*<>*<>*<>
The following morning, Draco waited until his mother left the Manor before writing a quick note, indicating he had gone to visit a friend and would return later that evening. He then stepped into the Floo and tossed down a handful of powder, calling out Harry's address. When he arrived in the main room of Harry's country home, his boyfriend was nowhere to be seen. "Harry?" he called, voice uncertain.
Harry rushed into the room, hair on end more so than usual, a paintbrush in one hand and a smear of white paint on his cheek. "Draco," he said, sounding both pleased and surprised, "I wasn't expecting you."
Normally, Draco would have made a wisecrack at that, but he was just so relieved to see Harry that he only asked meekly, "Is it okay if I spend the day with you?"
"I'll loan you an old T-shirt, and you can help me paint," quipped Harry. When Draco didn't react as he expected, his smile faded. "What's wrong?" he asked, setting down the paint brush and crossing the room to take Draco in his arms.
Draco sighed and rested his forehead on Harry's shoulder. "My mother is pressuring me to marry Pansy," he muttered.
"That's nothing new."
"No, you don't understand," Draco said, raising his head to look at Harry. "She's talking of having the banns read next week."
"Oh, I see," Harry replied, voice subdued.
"No, you don't," Draco insisted. "This is all my mother's doing. I've no wish to rush into marriage with Pansy."
"Which isn't to say you won't eventually marry Pansy," countered Harry.
Draco paused before responding, "I've a duty to my family."
"What about your duty to yourself?" countered Harry. "Don't you count in all of this? And what about me?"
"What about you?" snapped Draco, regretting it the instant the words left his mouth.
"Are you saying I don't matter?" demanded Harry, stepping away from his boyfriend.
"I'm sorry, Harry," Draco replied contritely. "It's just...Mother has been pressuring me about this since yesterday, and I thought I could come here to get away from it and relax. I miss you, and I don't want to spend our time together arguing."
"I'm sorry, too," sighed Harry, taking Draco in his arms once more. Stroking his boyfriend's hair soothingly, he added in a whisper, "Sooner or later, though, you'll have to make a decision."
<>*<>*<>*<>
"Mother, I'm really not ready for this!" Draco exclaimed in exasperation. Narcissa had begun berating him the instant he had returned home, negating all the stress-relieving sex he had engaged in with Harry. Once she'd castigated him about being gone all afternoon, Narcissa had launched directly into more discussion regarding the wedding.
"Don't be so dramatic, darling," she scolded. "No one is marching you down the aisle just yet; Eldora and I are merely trying to make plans."
"I wish you would consult me before you make plans," Draco said tightly, barely keeping his temper in check.
Narcissa planted her hands on her hips and responded, "What do you think I've been doing for the past half hour?"
"You have been making plans for my wedding without consulting me as to what my own plans or wishes may be," Draco insisted.
"Very well then," Narcissa replied coolly. "Tell me what your plans and wishes are."
Draco drew a deep breath while he carefully considered what he wanted to say. Deciding to be blunt, he squared his shoulders and declared, "I do not wish to get married any time soon, and I plan to spend the summer months traveling."
<>*<>*<>*<>
Later that evening, as Draco lay back in his bath and tried to relax, he imagined he could still hear his ears ringing after the tirade his mother had subjected him to. If he had to hear the word obligation one more time, he was going to be ill. He didn't blame his mother for wanting him to marry well and produce heirs; after all, he was the last Malfoy. However, he bloody well wished she wouldn't be so insistent that he get married so soon. He was young--he wanted to live a little first. What Draco really wanted was to spend as much time with Harry as possible. In fact, if he had any choice in the matter, he'd ask Harry to marry him.
Draco sat up straight at the thought. Same-sex bondings weren't unheard of in wizarding society. Why not ask Harry? As quickly as his excitement came, it deflated. He couldn't bond with Harry and produce an heir, and an heir is what his family demanded of him.
What to do? Draco had known he'd have to make a decision someday, choosing between the future he wanted with Harry and the future his family wanted for him, which included a wife and children. However, he hadn't anticipated being forced to choose so soon, and he wasn't ready for it.
Draco was torn. He loved Harry, yet he had feelings for Pansy, as well. Not romantic love or even lust; rather, he loved her as a friend and was loathe to disappoint her, knowing she assumed they would be wed some day. There was also the matter of his parents and his family honor. He was the last of the Malfoys, and if he didn't produce an heir, his family name, the name he'd been raised to uphold, would disappear. That was a huge consideration, and one that Draco did not take lightly.
Life shouldn't be so difficult at eighteen.
<>*<>*<>*<>
Ultimately, it was a visit from his former Potions professor that helped Draco reach the most important decision of his young life. Narcissa had invited Severus Snape to dinner, during which time she asked some embarrassingly blunt questions about potions designed to increase fertility. Apparently, not only had Narcissa already chosen Draco's spouse for him, but she was determined to see him reproduce at a rate that would rival the Weasleys.
Draco passed the meal in uncomfortable silence, speaking only when asked a direct question. He spent most of the time surreptitiously studying their guest and marveling that Snape managed to maintain his dour countenance even on a social visit. Draco had always naively assumed the man would be different outside the classroom, a little more approachable, perhaps, but Snape seemed as surly as ever.
Once their guest had departed, Draco commented on Snape's demeanor to his mother.
"He's been that way for as long as anyone can remember," Narcissa said airily. "Rumor has it there was an unrequited love interest in his youth that has soured his outlook on life."
Draco had lain awake that night, mulling over the implications of his mother's assessment of Severus Snape. If he acquiesced to her wishes, forsaking Harry to marry Pansy, would he become like Snape someday? The prospect of a future filled with bitter self-recrimination chilled Draco and made him long for Harry's warm and comforting presence in his bed.
<>*<>*<>*<>
Despite his mother's protests, Draco had announced he was going out for the day, and he was currently lying in his lover's arms, enjoying the lassitude that followed a vigorous shag. "Harry," he said solemnly, "I've made up my mind." Beside him, his boyfriend tensed.
"And...?" prompted Harry, bracing himself for the worst.
Draco untangled himself from Harry's embrace and sat up in the bed, resting against the mound of pillows. "As you know, upholding the family name is very important to me," Draco sighed, looking down at his clasped hands. As a result, he missed the stricken expression on Harry's face. After a pause, Draco continued, "But when faced with a choice between a loveless marriage or a lifetime of happiness with you, it was really no choice at all."
"What are you saying?" whispered Harry, his voice tight with tension.
Draco looked at him finally and smiled ruefully. "I'm going to tell my mother that I cannot marry Pansy."
Harry threw himself on Draco and snogged him until they were both breathless. Sitting back, he grinned and said, "I'd tell you I'm sorry, but that would be a lie."
Draco snuggled closer and rested his head on Harry's shoulder. "My mother will disown me, you know," he mumbled.
"Can she do that?" Harry asked, alarmed on behalf of his boyfriend.
"No, not really," Draco admitted, shifting about to get more comfortable. "She can, however, toss me out of the Manor and cut me off from any of the Malfoy funds until I turn twenty-five."
"You'll come live with me, of course," Harry offered gallantly.
"Yes," agreed Draco, "and I'll demand that you support me in the opulent manner to which I'm accustomed."
"Merciful Merlin," groaned Harry.
<>*<>*<>*<>
Draco had chosen to break the news to Pansy first. In a way, it was a more daunting task than telling his mother, simply because he had no idea how Pansy would react. He didn't know if she'd yell and throw things, or if she would turn on the waterworks and make him feel lower than giant squid poop.
The fact that everyone had been delighted when Draco called on Pansy at the Parkinsons' home didn't help him feel any better. Nevertheless, he vowed to see this through. Once her parents had excused themselves, tactfully leaving them alone in the parlor, Draco took Pansy's hand and looked into her eyes, his expression open and earnest. "Pansy, you know how very fond I am of you, and that the last thing I want to do is hurt you, but..."
"But, you're in love with Potter," she finished for him, voice subdued.
Draco bit his lip and nodded. "I'm in love with Harry," he confirmed. Pansy sighed, and Draco couldn't help but notice the hitch in the middle of it. "Will you ever forgive me?" he pleaded.
Pansy sat back and drew her hand away. "It will take some time," she answered honestly.
"I understand," Draco responded.
"I don't think you do," Pansy disagreed. "Like all girls, I've been dreaming of my wedding day for as long as I can remember, and I always pictured you by my side on the big day."
Her heartfelt confession tugged at Draco's emotions, and he leaned forward once more to brush a tear from her cheek. "You deserve someone better, Pansy," he said gruffly. "Someone who can love you with a whole heart."
"I know," she replied, lifting her chin and pretending it wasn't wobbling. "That's why I'm letting you go."
<>*<>*<>*<>
Narcissa Malfoy, unfortunately, refused to relinquish her dreams so easily. Draco waded into battle with determination and refused to be coaxed, cajoled, coerced or cowed into agreeing to an arranged marriage. Now that he'd made his decision in regards to his own future, Draco felt strangely detached from his mother's hysterical ranting. Rather than argue each point Narcissa brought up, Draco responded to everything she said by calmly stating that his mind was made up. This seemed to enrage his mother even more, and only the fact that Draco had his hand on his wand, hidden in the folds of his robes, and that he was quick with an Expelliarmus, saved him from a nasty hex.
Deciding a strategic retreat was in order, Draco scrambled for the Floo before his mother could retrieve her wand. He tumbled out of Harry's fireplace on the other end and lay there panting while he checked to be sure all parts were intact.
Harry glanced up from where he sat in his favorite chair, reading the Prophet. "How did the chat with your mother go?" he asked, obviously struggling not to laugh.
"Swimmingly," muttered Draco, standing and brushing himself off.
Harry set the paper aside and held out his arms, and Draco rushed over and wedged himself into the chair with his boyfriend. Harry stroked his hair soothingly and said, "Don't worry. Narcissa will come around in, oh, ten or twenty years."
"Not funny," mumbled Draco against Harry's neck.
"In the meantime," Harry continued, "you have my love to keep you warm."
"And your money to keep me happy, yeah?"
"Yes, my greedy sweetheart," sighed Harry. "You'll have my love and my money."